Say Yes to The Dress Twice

The Moment:

The first time I went wedding dress shopping was due to complete boredom. I walked into David’s Bridal with my best friends and looked at a dress and said "That is an ugly dress." It would figure that the one dress I singled out as unattractive would be the winner. It was the end of the day and I still hadn’t found the dress that made me want to shout and run around the store, so we decided to look at dresses I didn’t like.

First Dress at David's Bridal - Not Winner

Once I put on my dress it was a feeling I can’t really explain. Everyone gasped when I came out, but I still couldn’t see myself and I thought I looked bad in it. As I turned around and looked at myself my world just stopped. I looked in the mirror and saw myself as Mrs. Felicia Bond. My best friends started crying and made the situation all the more emotional. There were butterflies in my stomach, my body felt warm all over and I just couldn’t stop looking at myself. It felt so good I wanted to call Reuben and show him what I looked like. I wanted him to see the look on my face and the way I couldn’t stop smiling. I knew that if I stopped smiling I would cry like a big dramatic bridezilla in the store. Regardless, I knew that in this amazing dress the man I love more than life itself would believe that I was the most beautiful bride he would ever see in his life.

I tried looking at other dress, but none of them came close to the same feelings or look I wanted. I guess thats why they say once you've found your dress grab it and run.

A couple of weeks later I returned with my mother and my aunt Pattie. I felt I had cheated them on the experience of wedding dress shopping with me, so we went back to David’s Bridal. Truthfully, I was looking forward to the water works that would occur between the two of them. It was the look on their faces as they saw me in my wedding dress that made me breakdown with them. They looked so happy and proud that I couldn’t hold back. The afternoon began with three red faced women laughing and crying in a crowed bridal store. A memory I will carry with me for life.

My original bridal consultant Jessica came and gave me a hug and told me to make a wish and ring the wedding bell. I made my wish and said “yes to the dress.” The biggest surprise and moment of the day came when my mother bought my wedding dress for me. I couldn’t stop smiling and even did a happy dance in the street.

I told my fiancé that I got my wedding dress and he replied, “I know you’ll be breathtakingly beautiful in your dress.” I knew from that simple comment that he would more than likely make me want to cry as I walk down the aisle to meet my future husband.

Wedding Dress Shopping Advice from a Budget Bridezilla

Never let a budget stop you from getting the dress of your dreams. You generally only get one dress, so make it count.

Be reasonable as well. If you have a $500 to $1000 wedding dress budget don’t get crazy and try to buy the $5,000 designer dress from Kleinfield Bridal.

Go in the bridal boutiques with an open mind and try styles that you wouldn’t normally consider.

Take people you love and trust with you. Although, I would exclude the overly opinionated and/pr potentially jealous friend from the mix.

Remember to have fun and take your time.

When you find your dress, don't forget to do the happy dance.  

Flowers, Flowers, Everywhere

Flowers are a very important part of weddings. It’s keeps people in touch with nature and reminds us that we share a union with mother earth as well as our spouses. I know I’m getting a little mushy here, but I love nature and that is why we arehaving a country wedding.

There is nothing better than being able to bask in the glory that is earth – well except for the creepy crawlies. Yikes, bugs please don’t feel the need to crawl on my dress during the wedding because I will lose my mind. Back to the point – a lot of consideration goes into choosing the right flowers for your special day.

 Seven things to keep in mind when choosing wedding flowers:

1.      Is the price right? How much are you willing to spend on flowers? As I mentioned in a previous blog post flowers account for about eight percent of your wedding budget.

2.     Are you willing to construct your own bridal bouquets and the groomsman boutonnieres? This can actually be cost saving. It is often the labor involved with florist assembling the bouquets that raises the price considerably.

3.    Real or silk flowers, never plastic that’s just cheap. SilkFlowerFactory.com has beautiful realistic looking flowers, but I still prefer the real thing.

4.     Do the flowers work with the environment? For example, unless you’re having a Christmas wedding azaleas and poinsettias just look out of place.

5.     How big or small do you want the bouquets? If you a choosing a flower such as the large calla lily then have a single or few looks quite lovely as bridal bouquets.

Example of Large Calla Lily Bouquet

6.     Do you want your bridesmaids to have bouquets or corsages? Both are beautiful in their own right, but I personally feel that corsages are for prom not weddings. Ironically, that’s not stopping me from purchasing corsages for the mother-of-the-bride and the mother-of-the-groom.

7.     Most important: Are your desired wedding flowers available year-round or are they seasonal? This could make a difference in price as well as obtaining the flowers you truly want for your special day.  

Remember to avoid having your flowers drowned out by your wedding dress or bridesmaid dresses. For example, red flowers on top of a red dress do not pop as much as pink or white floral bouquets.

I’ve talked with multiple florists in the RTP area including North Raleigh Florists, Fallon’s Flowers, and World of Flowers. I also ventured down the path of creating the bouquets and boutonnieres myself and found competitive prices at PacificCallas.com and FlowerMuse.com.

North Raleigh Florist:

Ms. Brandi Dennison a wedding coordinator for North Raleigh Florist mentioned that “Calla Lilies were a good choice for the hot summer months because they don’t wilt as quickly as other flowers.” I found Mrs. Dennison be wonderfully helpful in furthering my decision to go calla lily crazy at my wedding. It didn’t hurt that the quoted price was well within my budget. I asked if the calla lilies I desired could be ordered when needed. Ms. Dennison replied, “All the flowers are coming from Ecuador, so they are available year-round.”

Picture: NorthRaleighFlorist.Com

Fallon’s Flowers:

Mrs. Diane Reiman recommended that I place the order for the flowers at least two months in advance of the wedding. The best part about talking to her was the price lock guarantee. Essentially, when I decide to order my flowers the price I am quoted is the price I pay. When I asked about pricing Mrs. Reiman replied, “There is a one hundred dollar non-refundable deposit required and even if you decided to cancel, the deposit could be applied to store credit.”

I have to say I had the best experience in Fallon’s and Mrs. Reiman was a pleasure to work with. I feel she took the time to get to know me and what I wanted out of the bridal flowers. She made suggestions that matched my tastes and made an in-depth price sheet for me. Her supervisor Mr. Frank guaranteed that Fallon’s Flowers had the best prices. I wholeheartedly believe them and can’t wait to work with them in the future.

Why do I Have to Feed the Guest Again?

According to wedding specialists the typical costs of catering should be 40 percent of the wedding budget and flowers should be eight percent. So with roughly a four thousand dollar budget I’m looking at spending $1600 on food and $320 on flowers. I can live with the flower budget, but the food budget is nowhere near what my fiancé or I are willing to pay. So we did a little research and what did we find? Simply put – Caterers have lost their minds!

Once you have decided on the time and location of wedding reception, it becomes easier to plan for catering. For instance, if your wedding is after lunch then you could do a cocktail or hor d'ourves hour to mingle with wedding guests and eat cake. Most people will have already eaten dinner and therefore, not consume a lot of food. We decide to do a picnic style wedding with finger foods, picnic foods, and fruit/cheese trays. The picnic style works perfectly with our Country Wedding in the City theme. Plus, we both love going picnicking at Umstead Park, so why not.

We started by looking at the different caterers in the Raleigh area, it was between $25 and $50 a person and we’re inviting roughly 110 guests. Since our wedding is taking place before lunch, it is necessary that we provide adequate food options for the guests and stay within the budget.

Premiere Catering & Events: Jessica King, the Lead Designer at informed us that for hor d'ourves, the price per person was $25. On the low end that’s about $2750 and on the high end we’re looking at more than the wedding budget at $5500. Ms. King informed us that “The food for the events is ordered specifically for the event. As well as they use local organic products to supply the events.” I like this fact and I’m still not willing to pay the price.

Catering by Design: Prices are a little high but considering that the food comes with linens, chinaware, servers and a bartender it's still still too rich for my blood. The best value option is $34 per person and the cost conscious option is $40 per person.

Tip: Make sure your venue allows alcoholic beverages on the premises before committing to buying tons of alcohol.

Family: We both have chefs in our family and they all want to help out with the wedding. They can cook and prepare exactly what we want to eat and take care of most of the costs associated with catering. Plus, family is already of aware of the food preferences and allergies of other family members and prepare the food accordingly.

I think the winner is to utilize family resources and have our picnic reception catered by the people we love. Family caterers supply the extra ingredient  of love that makes the food taste all the better.

Mothers Day Out

Even though having order in planning a wedding is important, sometimes you just have to go with the flow. When opportunities arise to look at new things then you should take it. For example, my future mother-in-law, Mrs. Bond, wanted to go look at tuxedos with my fiancé Reuben and I. I thought hey why not.  We could get him sized and just maybe she will agree that Reuben looks better in a black tux instead of a gray one.

Suites for the Men - Mens Warehouse

                By the end of the trip to Men’s Warehouse she was on my side and I decide that Reuben should wear a black tux with silver accents and the groomsmen shall wear black tuxedos with lapis (purple) accents. The helpful young man at the store suggested that the groom and groomsmen be fitted for their tuxes at least four to six months ahead of time.

The next day we decided to go look at florists, food for the wedding, and decide if we were going to rent/or buy the decorations for the reception. The journey was long and surprisingly fun with my mom and future mother-in-law. For flowers and food we looked at World of Flowers, BJs, and Sam’s Club. Then Michaels to look at wedding decorations. Found some really cool stuff at Michaels, but that's a post for another day. Back to the point. Pricing wise it is very convenient to cater the wedding ourselves, but issues could arise with regard to venues having preferred venue notations.

Michaels.com

My mother and future mother-in-law were very helpful and made the trip all the more fun. Mrs. Bond and my mom gave the best advice at the end of the day. “It’s your wedding and can invite or not invite anyone that you think will be a problem. Feelings aside this is your wedding and you shouldn’t have to worry about other people on your special day.” I couldn’t agree more. It would definitely cut the guest list down if I excluded a couple of people that might pose a problem at the wedding.

                We ended the night by eating at Applebee’s and meeting up with my future husband-to-be Reuben for dinner. As we waited for his arrival we took to adding the groom’s side of the family to the guest list and thought of friends, church members, and co-workers we would want to invite. The day out with the moms made me realize how glad I am that I do have a close relationship with the both of them. Reuben and I are both happy that we have their love and support in moving with our decision to get married. That is almost the best feeling out of the whole wedding experience besides for the nuptials.  

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Finding the Perfect Venue.

Where will the magic take place? How do you envision the day you marry the man/woman of your dreams? My dream wedding would take place at Kew Gardens in London with close friends and family. Since I'm a Bridezilla on a Budget, I'll aim for the next best thing.

 

Note: I am a born and breed city girl with a country heart, but I hate spiders. The other day I was visiting the JC Raulston Arboretum with my fiance and going over wedding possibilities when a spider crawled onto my wedding book and scared the devil out of me. Reuben, looks at me and says "You do realize you want an outdoor/country wedding and your afraid of spiders." I reply, "There is no rule about liking bugs and being a country girl at the same time."

 

To start we decided to have a wedding with a country feel to it and, thus I started looking at outside venues in the RTP area with my fiance. The top four contenders were Duke Gardens, JC Raulston Arboretum, The Raleigh Little Theatre Rose Garden, and the WRAL Azalea Gardens.

 

The next step was to create a tentative guest list to determine if each venue could hold the number of guests selected and what amenities were offered at each venue. We also needed to consider which months were hardest to book for the venues and if we would be able to book a year in advance. When speaking with a representative at the Raleigh Little Theatre I learned that April and May were the busiest months and June was generally free at least until 6PM when the theatre closed the location. The JC Raulston Arboretum was also pretty much open in June as well.

 

Then it was necessary to take a look at the prices. In the end, we chose the venue that was the best value and overall had everything we could want:The JC Raulston Arboretum White Garden. It is beautiful, secluded, and has the perfect natural archway of vines for my grand entrance.

Photographer: Mark Weathington

 

Remember: When you visit the different venues it should be fun as well as informative. You should enjoy yourselves and be able to feel comfortable. Nothing worse than a stuffy wedding ceremony if you ask me. I enjoyed walking the gardens with my future husband and taking pictures of the gardens, which helped give us the idea to have our engagement photos taken at the various gardens even if we only chose one for the wedding ceremony.





Photographer: Katie Perry

Steps to Finding the Perfect Venue:
Style -Capacity-Price-Overall Feel-Backup Plan

1. Decide what type of wedding you want or the style.
2. How many guest do you want and will the venues hold that amount?
3. Price check venues and learn what amenities are available.
4. Make sure to visit the different locations and have fun.
5. Then make an informative decision while having multiple dates in mind.
6. Always have a backup indoor place just case of bad weather or obtain wedding insurance to cover lost costs due to cancellations.

Photos found at http://www.ncsu.edu/jcraulstonarboretum

Why Am I Looking At Flowers Now?

www.weddinglater.com

Looking at anything other than a venue this early in the game is just ridiculous. I realize that the general consensus is to choose a venue first and then worry about the other details of your wedding, but consider this, shouldn't a budget be set first and foremost.

I mean if it was me and I had unlimited resources then the sky would be the limit and to hell with the costs, but since I do have a firm grasp on reality I understand that budgets need to be set.

Therefore, you have me a Bridezilla on a Budget. Note: I may be on budget, but I'll still make it do what it do. Then in my opinion you need to decide on how many people you want to invite to the wedding to make sure that those people can and will be able to fit comfortably at the chosen venue. I mean I realized today I spent two hours trying to decide on floral arrangements that there are more pressing matters that need to be addresses first. Granted I did find some amazing deals on beautiful bouquets from SilkFlowerFactory.Com and BunchesDirect.Com.

Later I went with my mother to visit World of Flowers in Durham, NC. She spoke very highly of the quality of work and I was happily convinced once the owner informed me she could create exactly what I wanted. She explained that since my wedding is a year away that the prices of my flower the calla lily could change by the time I was ready to order.

Mrs. Judy Edwards, the florist was very helpful to talk to about what I desired for my wedding. Her best tip was that "If the bridesmaids dresses are a dark color (lapis), then it is better to choose a brighter colored flower otherwise the bouquets are washed out." I agreed and decided to go with large white calla lily bouquets and boutonnieres for the bridal party, while I can still have a purple/white calla lily and rose bouquet. I do have to stand-out after all. And all within my price range. Flowers covered.

 

Here's My List of To Do's:
Step 1: Set a REALISTIC budget
Step 2: Decide what type of wedding you want? Be it traditional, outdoors, Vegas style or etc.
Step 3: Choose Venue for Wedding/Reception & Decide on number of Patrons

Step 4: Choose Date  - Now this could certain depend on if the venue is highly desired or the time of season that you intend to get married. For instance, some locations operate on a lottery system and, therefore one must come prepared with multiple dates for their wedding.

Step 5: Choose Bridal and Groom Party while simultaneously choosing color scheme. Note: Chose more bridesmaids and grooms men than you need,because you never know when you have to kick someone to the curb. Make them sign bridal contracts that state if you f-up and piss the bride or groom off then they are not responsible for the money you have spent on the wedding.



bouquetbridal.blogspot.com



BunchesDirect.com



I'm going to start with these because they are most important and take up a good portion of the budget.

*I love these bouquets.

The Talk

Every little girl grows up picturing their wedding and their prince charming smiling like he just won the biggest prize or softly crying(manly tears) as she walks down the aisle, but lets remember certain events have to take place before a wedding is even mentioned in the relationships.

First, if either the bride or groom are traditionalist then it is the grooms responsibility to ask the brides mother or father for her hand in marriage. I am a traditionalist myself and wholeheartedly believe the groom should ask permission if only for the laughs I get looking back on the exact moment.

Earlier this week, I had dinner with my boyfriends parents and my mom and we discussed the idea that we wanted to get married. The responses from them were comical and somewhat unexpected. They want to know details and when did we expect to them that this was the plan because they needed time to prepare and plan. My thought was why are you planning isn't it our wedding, but nonetheless I'm glad that they were happy for us and wanted to help with the planning.

Then of course most women have an idea of how they want to be proposed to. My ideal proposal would consist of my boyfriend getting me a limited edition of my favorite book that is hollowed out and give it to me as a present. I would be mad that it wasn't exactly the book, but to open it and find a ring would be beautiful. Once all the preliminary events are out of the way the question is what to do next is it the dress, venue, pastor, date, or budget?

I asked roughly 20 people what is the first thing they do when they plan a wedding and her were a few of the responses:
Now this is funny. A female patron replied: Depends if I'm marrying for love or money. If I'm getting married for money, then first I'm planning my divorce party. If I'm marrying for love, then I'm planning my honeymoon, i.e first stop Victoria Secret.

A male replied: Most guys would panic about the costs of the wedding, but otherwise what type of wedding the couple wants and where to have the wedding is first on the list.

A few responses consisted of finding a dress and to be honest that was my first thought and then the location. The major consensus between the people surveyed was location.